Love Yourself to Attract Love

Today I had a date with myself in Santa Monica. Something was drawing me to really spend some time on my own and enjoy my own company, instead of calling up a friend instinctually. I did some shopping at a favorite store and had a really great raw lunch at a beautifully spirited restaurant, Euphoria Loves Rawvolution. At the restaurant, I picked up a book called Igniting Life, and found myself in the love section of the book. I read:

To bring love into your life, you must first love your self. Love for self includes taking care of and respecting your physical being as well as other life forms, such as the animals of the land, sky and water. Love for self includes believing that your essence is worthy of love. Knowing that you are worthy of love will drive you to improve your life in every way." -- Igniting Your Life, John McCabe

Though I was having a wonderful time being with my self all day, I did have this lingering blue energy around me even as I sat with my feet in the sand. It was like I wasn't fully accepting myself or entirely enjoying this time of self-healing. Something was missing. This quote made me realize that when I am feeling overwhelmed by sad emotions, I slump into judging myself and feeling unworthy. Unworthy of love, of affection, of company - whatever it may be. And then I punish myself in this dark place until I shake it off, find the answer in Nature, or am brought back to consciousness with the helping hand of a friend. Then I realize that what I'm missing is acceptance - of myself, of what I'm feeling in this moment, of how the world is moving around me, etc. I underwent the full arc of this emotional experience today, and it's interesting to look at it this evening, in retrospect. 


It's so important for me (and all of us) to have respect for myself, and to treat my own heart, soul, and body with the ultimate care and concern. As challenging as it is, I really love learning how to better check in with myself and to look at myself with an objective eye, such that I prioritize taking care of me. Often times I would rather take care of others than truly satisfy my own needs. You can't find true love and respect IN anyone else - it's something that each person must first have with themselves. The beauty lies in the times when two people who truly do love themselves and are open to exploring deeper come together - as two separate wholes that can nurture one another as they are. Now that is Euphoric. 

#10: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

Funny how these seem to pop up on the precise days that I need them most! I guess it's a combination of the fact that all of these tips apply to every day, and the energy pulling me towards needing a boost.

Don’t take life so seriously! Learn to laugh at the little things and this whole "existence" thing will be a whole lot easier. Be amused by your mistakes and failures and be thankful that you learned your lesson and won't mess up like that again. And most importantly, do things that you enjoy! Life is not strictly business, it can be mixed with pleasure.

I woke up on the wrong side of the bed thing morning and rolled out kicking and screaming. I could have ruined my whole day if I kept that attitude up. Luckily I have people in my life who can see my mistakes and remind me that no mistake is really that big of a deal. We are still here aren't we? Well, then there is a lot more living to do, and a lot less pouting and regretting. It's such an art to be able to laugh at ourselves in times of failure and weakness. But if we are staying present, those "times" really don't last that long (they certainly don't really exist the length of a whole morning).

Love Your Bod, Eat Raw

Today I shared the following smoothie and juice tips with my boss' boss. Everyone in the office sees me with weird green juices in the morning, spooning avocado at my desk, and slicing fruit in the kitchen on a weekly basis. So I often get questions about my diet and how to eat healthier. Since I already wrote this up and shared with a head honcho, I thought I'd share with you all as well! 


Your body needs AND craves foods that are closest to their natural form - straight from Mother Nature - RAW. Here are two of my favorite smoothies, as well as a green juice I like in the mornings. There are additional tips and suggestions for eating more greens and for when you concoct your own recipes as well. Happy eating, greenies! 


Two Favorite Smoothies

Choco-Nut-Nana Smoothie - tastes like dessert! But it's ALL healthy!

• 2-4 TBSP Chocolate Hemp Powder (from Trader Joes) or Cacao Nibs or Cacao Powder
• 1-2 TBSP Raw Almond Butter (from TJs)
• 1 Banana
• 2-3 Dates (optional)
• 1/2-1 cup of Unsweetened Vanilla Almond Milk (TJs or most grocery stores)
• As much ice as you like (I like about 6 cubes)

Morning Smoothie

• 1 banana
• 5-7 strawberries (fresh or frozen)
• Handful of blueberries (fresh or frozen)
• Cubed mango (fresh or frozen)
• Splash of Unsweetened Vanilla Almond Milk
• Spinach (you will be surprised at how much you can add and still not taste it - try two big handfuls)
• As much ice as you like

Smoothie/Fruit Tips

If you want to blend with kale, it's best to counter it with a citrus fruit (like orange) and/or pineapple, and maybe even some ginger. Bananas always help to sweeten it up and mellow it out too. Spinach is a lot easier to mask than kale. Keep trying out different fruit combos unlike you get the sweetness you prefer. I suggest not blending in apples with your greens, as they tend to hurt the stomach when trying to digest simultaneously with greens (I did research on fruit/veggie combos and digestion). Apples are best to eat by themselves, and before any other foods (as they digest quicker than most other foods).

Substitute Almond Milk with one cup of plain, non-fat Greek Yogurt if you want a thicker and more filling smoothie.

Greens

If you have a juicer, it's really easy to get your daily value of veggies in the morning with a fresh juice. Otherwise, even when I'm eating super healthy, I may forget to eat enough greens and go fruit and nut crazy. If you like hummus, eating broccoli and cauliflower florets and some baby carrots is yummy with that. Not only does Trader Joes have awesome hummus (if you don't want to make your own raw version), but they have those great pre-washed veggie medley packs that you can separate into zip lock bags for the week. Hello, encouragement!

Green Juice

• 2-3 carrots
• 1 cucumber (this is essential to add "water" / mellow out the other intense flavors)
• 3 big stalks celery (this is essential to add "water" / mellow out the other intense flavors)
• Kale and/or spinach and/or whatever other lettuce you have in the fridge
• 1 orange or 2 spears of pineapple 
• Ginger (optional - helps with stronger greens)
• Lemon (optional - helps with stronger greens)
• Suggestion: stay away from or limit the amount of collard greens and chard - they are INTENSE and add an icky kick to your smoothie if not countered properly
• This juice is not super sweet, but it's really refreshing. You start to crave it in the morning 
• Tip: I drink immediately after juicing with some ice on my way to work. The quicker you can drink your juice after juicing, the better. The juice will lose the vast majority of its nutrients if you, for example, make the juice the night before. 

Paying it Forward

This morning I awoke to an unexpected helping hand, and it made me want to help others without being asked all day. It's really a beautiful thing to give (whether a compliment, advice, a smile, etc.) when it isn't even called for. It really warms the soul and it seems to exude a contagious energy of generosity. You don't have to give money or an object of monetary value - sometimes a few words of encouragement, a handmade gift, or a thoughtful reminder of your love are all someone needs to jump start their day. And perhaps they too will pay it forward coming off the high that you gave them...

#9: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

This is a great reminder for all of us.

Drink water. Hydration is tremendously important for overall health. Soda has absolutely ZERO nutritional content; it's like pouring a punch of sugar into your cup. Instead, fill it with life-replenishing water. It may taste plain at first if you're coming off of a heavy soda-drinking streak, but you'll soon find yourself addicted to it. 10 glasses per day us optimal, how many have you been getting lately?

I'm currently trying to kick a cold, so getting enough water is especially imperative for me right now. What I like to do to "remind" myself to drink water or to gauge how much I've had is to fill up a big metal canteen and keep it on my desk at work. I know that I should go through AT LEAST one full canteen just in the time that I'm at work. When I am regularly practicing Bikram Yoga (which I am right now), then I need probably double what I think I can handle. Soon it becomes second nature to just take gulps throughout the day. You realize that times you thought you were hungry for a snack, your body was actually just thirsty!

Right now with my sore throat, I struggle to drink a lot of water because the water at work comes from a chiller. Cold water on a sore throat is NO fun. So hot tea has been my go-to. But water in it's pure form is really important. Try to have room temperature water as much as you can, because the body actually absorbs it faster. (The body has to heat up everything to body temperature before it can be absorbed, so it takes longer for the body to really drink in the cold water.)

While I don't ever drink soda, I know it's a big "thing" for some people. If you care about your health at all, you won't drink that crap. As for juice - if you MUST drink the concentrated stuff, at least cut it in half with water to wean off of it. Otherwise, you should really invest in a juicer. Veggie juice in the morning gives me more energy than coffee.Oh, and coffee? Kick that to the curb too. Not only is it addicting (in more ways than one - I'm looking at you people who make the cup in the morning and then let it sit out), but it also leaches vitamins and minerals from the body. Particularly, it leaches calcium from your bones. And you will die. Just kidding - but really, drink more water!!!

#8: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

I must admit, I did smile when I saw #8. This tip couldn't have come at a more perfect time.

Smile more often. Whenever you get a grin on your face, your brain is releasing serotonin, the happy hormone. Smiling is the natural way to force yourself to be happy. Many people even smile for five minutes straight in the morning to get themselves in a great mood for the day. It is a very powerful tool that is utilized less and less as we grow older and need happiness more than ever. Just remember that while happiness leads to smiles, smiles also lead to happiness.

Look at that perfect cycle! Happiness leads to smiles, just like smiles lead to happiness! The holidays are the 'most wonderful time of the year,' but they can also be some of the most emotional times. We look at those who are present in our lives, those who are far away, those who are temporarily absent, and those who are forever gone. We look at chapters closed and projects that have gathered dust. The start of the new year can also be very moving as we purge the old and open our minds to the new. Heck - with all of this movement in our lives and deep thinking, we may forget to stop and smell the roses (and smile!). The anticipation built up around the close of 2011, and then around the beginning of 2012 sometimes makes me want to crawl into a hole. SO much to take in. But it is in these moments of avoidance and resistance that I sink into no-smiling mode, and my mood is definitely directly affected by that (and vice versa).


That being said... SMILE! :D Think about the possibilities (for this very moment and even for the days ahead) and recognize that you are creating your own reality every single moment. Being sad isn't a reality unless you let it be! With the flick of a switch, you can shake off whatever negative emotion you are feeling and try out happiness instead. (But you have to truly want to be happy for this 'trick' to work. I have definitely said I wanted to be happy, but really just wanted to sulk in misery. Bad move.) Watch your favorite movie, dance around to some awesome music, cuddle up with a good book, try a new recipe, get some exercise, watch a funny cat video (if you're into that... like me), call an old friend. There are endless ways to bring a smile to your face. Somehow it's easy to forget the infinite opportunities when we are deep in our sad caves of resistance. I'm so happy to put this out into the universe so that I can be reminded to smile and all of the reasons why I should! "Every end is a new beginning" - 'new' anything is exciting and reason to smile!


Here is a song that ALWAYS makes me smile from a movie that makes me really happy...

The Art of Alone

Something that I have been resisting lately is being alone. This struggle is part of cultivating my own space and growing my relationship with myself. Learning to wholeheartedly love and accept myself and all that comes with me is a never ending journey. I can definitely chose to see this journey as something invigorating and exciting, rather than pinpointing my weaknesses or harshly judging my progress. My emotions, ebbing and flowing, sometimes lure me to a place where I forge a sad aloneness. While I'm never truly alone or without something to explore in myself, it's easy to rock myself into a fantastical yearning for another's presence and energy. 

I find that blogging, organizing my space, and creating things are really helpful when I am feeling hopeless in my solitude. My first psychoanalytic instinct says that these are all healthy "distractions" from recognizing that I am without a friend or lover at the moment. But I can chose to see these more simply as hobbies and ways of nurturing myself. It's the times when I shut down and convince myself that being with someone else would feel infinitely nicer than listening to my own thoughts or learning more about myself that I really crave love from others. I daydream of a surprise visit and think up expectations of company, only to let myself down. This just illuminates the fact that I sometimes use the company of others to avoid confronting something in myself, or try to rely on someone else for things that I really should be extracting from within. I need to remember that "I am enough" and that I am truly 100% self-sufficient. 

When I use blogging to examine myself objectively, it helps me to laugh and feel inspired to shake off the silliness I fuel with unrealities. Being alone is a beautiful thing - a time to get things done and probe myself for the tasks and thoughts that get lost when others are around. This is a sacred time to download the day and revisit things I may have skipped over; to research an unanswered question; to start that house project I've been delaying; to pamper myself with a bath or a movie night. It's not so bad after all...