#25 & #26: Life Secrets and Tips

I haven't shared life tips from High Existence in a while, so I thought I'd post about two today.

25. Read Zen and the Art of Happiness by Chris Prentiss. This book will give you the knowledge and instruction to be happy at all times, regardless of the circumstances. Yes this sounds like an oversimplification of happiness, but I assure you that this book will change you in an amazing way.

While I don't know anything about this book, I did some research online and it has some great reviews. I am always looking for new books to keep my mind fresh and my heart open (people wonder why I don't watch TV or prioritize movies.... I would MUCH rather read). This sounds like it definitely meets my qualifications. 

Here is an excerpt from Amazon: In Zen and the Art of Happiness, you will learn how to think and feel so that what you think and feel creates happiness and vibrancy in your life rather than gloominess or depression. You'll learn how to adapt to life's inevitable changes, how to deal with stress in a healthy way, and how to nurture a mindful happiness in your daily life. Most importantly, the gentle wisdom of Zen and the Art of Happiness will show you how to invite magnificent experiences into your life and create a personal philosophy that will sustain you through anything. A timeless work about the art of happiness, the way of happiness, the inner game of happiness.

Sounds fabulous to me! I think we could all use some tips about how to de-stress and how to rewire our thinking to ensure maximum vitality in our lives! The next tip...

26. Develop the ability to forgive. Forgiveness is something that most people fail miserably at even though it's so simple. Grudges only bring more misery to those who hold them and prevent good relations with the target. YOU make mistakes all of the time, so why not have mercy when others do? Remaining angry feels horrible, while forgiving someone brings a refreshing sensation to the mind and healing to the relationship.

Forgiveness is so healing, and until we truly practice it altruistically, it's impossible to really reap the benefits (peace of mind, light heart, clear conscious, abundant light). Our ego and our pride LOVE to get in the way of forgiveness. We like to feel like our emotions are justified and knowing that someone has wronged us (putting them in the "bad guy" position). Usually, when we want to withhold forgiveness from others, we are feeling badly about ourselves underneath all else. Whenever you are finding it difficult to let go of the actions or words of others, ask yourself what holding onto that weight is doing for you. Is it allowing you to be the victim? Validating being hurt? Making the other person wrong? Demanding attention from others? You will probably answer "yes" to all of those things. I have been there (strangling the possibility for love by withholding forgiveness) enough times to know. Sometimes for 10 minutes, sometimes for 10 years. It is so much lighter on the heart and mind to surrender our pride and to be ALL about love and acceptance. When you are honestly committed to those two things, there simply isn't any room in your being for grudges. Life is too short to cut people out for the things they may have done or said. Don't waste any time blaming your parents, holding a grudge against that friend, or wallowing in your hurt...because you will miss the beauty and possibility that await around every corner if you do. Be at peace. Treat yourself and others with love.

#24: Life Secrets and Tips

Today's tip is vital to our happiness and self-confidence... 

Learn to be unaffected by the words of others. Most people get very upset when they are called negative names by others, but there is a simple trick to overcoming this. Here it is: If I went up to you and called you a fire hydrant, would you be upset? Of course not. Obviously you are not a fire hydrant, you are a human being. The same concept applies to when someone calls you something that you know you are not. They are foolish for saying such things, so why would you react with such anger? The only exception is when someone calls you something that is true! In this case, you should thank them for alerting you to a weakness, one that you can now work on changing.

I want to add onto this and say "learn to be unaffected by the actions of others" too. People's thoughts, actions, and opinions can't affect you unless you allow yourself to personalize them. Personalizing things means that you give someone else the power to define you - letting another person's decisions or expressions say something about who YOU are as a person. That's probably one of the most hurtful things we can do to ourselves. WE are the only ones that get to say anything about ourselves - no one else defines us.When I notice that I'm allowing myself to feel affected by the words or actions of others, I visualize myself as a shell being rolling back and forth in the tide. Just letting everything pass right around me, rocking me gently while I remain strong at my core. My shell can only be corroded if I continually submit to being pushed around by the tide (refusing to remove myself from toxic situations/people). At my strongest and most balanced, my little legs emerge from the shell, and I scurry away happy and unaffected. Sometimes all we want to do is tuck in our legs and be tossed around by the words and actions of others. At times, it seems so much easier than removing ourselves from the situation. But who really wants to succumb to that sickening tilt-a-whirl? We must gain strength and DESIRE to be the facilitators of our own destiny. We need to stretch out our legs and move towards light. We can't see anything in the dark. The Universe has a beautiful plan for each and every one of us - you aren't going to hear its guidance and see the signs tucked away in that shell.

You are powerful, my little hermit crabs!

#23: Life Secrets and Tips

No pain, no gain? I don't know if I buy into this tip...

The Rubberband Method. This is the third and final way to rid yourself of negative thoughts (hopefully by now you have figured out that this is very important!). Place a rubber band around your wrist and snap it against your skin anytime a negative thought finds its way into your head. This operant conditioning technique associates a slight pain with negative thoughts like Pavlov associated food/salivation with the sound of a bell. Sounds a bit cruel at first but it only stings for a second, I promise. Plus the outcome, having only positive thoughts, far outweighs a little slap on the wrist here and there.

If I did this every time I had a negative thought, I would have a sore wrist. If I did this every time I wasn't present, like having longing or regretful thoughts, I'm not sure I would have much of a wrist left to snap. Looks like I need to recenter this weekend. I just received a book recommendation in the mail, and I think it would be a great way to get started (Who Switched Off My Brain? Revised: Controlling Toxic Thoughts and Emotions). My pile of must-reads is stacking up though. Luckily, it will be warm and sunny this weekend! Makes for perfect outdoor reading and meandering in my own head.


Though seemingly simple, even small posts like this are wonderful "verbalizations" of my priorities and encouragements for a transformation...or twelve.


Keep on loving, friends! Yourself included. For there is no true love of others without loving yourself first.

#21: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

I'm always open to learning new ways of dispelling negative thoughts from my mind. Here is an interesting visualization method that I like a lot. I am a visual/hands-on learner, so anything that I can imagine or actually do with my hands is sure to stick.

Utilize ‘The Burning Method.’ Whenever a fear or worry or complaint comes to mind, close your eyes and imagine writing down the thought on a piece of paper. Then proceed to light the paper on fire and watch it disintegrate. Even better, actually write it down and burn it. You won't have any problem ridding your mind of the thought after doing thing.

Anyone have a lighter?
What are you 'burning' today, now and forever?

#20: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

This is a nice way to wake up on the RIGHT side of the bed, every morning!

Start your day off right. Wake up and set aside an hour for personal development activities (meditation, self-introspection, observing nature, etc.) Do the things that make you feel blissful, optimistic, and empowered so that you can set a positive tone for your day. I guarantee that once you start doing this, your days will be more enjoyable and fulfilling. Today is going to be the best day of your life. Duh.

The morning really does feel so much nicer when you can take your time getting ready, soak in the sun a little bit, and possibly get all of your "worrying" out of the way. The days that I rush out of bed to get dressed and fly into my car, I feel like that all day - go, go, go... oops, forgot to smell the roses. I hate those days. When I used to wake up early to go hiking in my neighborhood, I always felt so much more centered and awake for the day by the time I needed to get into my car and start the day's grind. Taking in some nature and/or having a cup of tea in my kitchen without any time crunch is so soothing before a busy day. My only excuse for not doing this every morning is lack of sleep. So I just need to get into bed earlier to have that blissful morning. I can do that!What are your favorite morning musings?(love this song to start a relaxed morning)

#19: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

Okay, okay. Today's tip is easier said than done. But take some serious time to brainstorm or journal about this.

Figure out what your goals and dreams are. So many people wander aimlessly through life, simply going for whatever small thing they want moment by moment. Instead, decide what your perfect life consists of and begin to put the steps in motion to reach that place. The most satisfying thing in the world is overcoming a challenge and reaching a goal. We are the happiest when we are growing and working towards something better.

Of course, your interests may change as you pursue different avenues. And that's wonderful - nothing to get discouraged about. Sometimes life experiences (e.g. the career world) is more a process of elimination than constantly aiming for the bulls eye. Figuring out what you don't want is just as valuable as those light bulb moments when we discover that something/someone truly speaks to our heart. It's important not to get discouraged when we have those realizations of "this isn't working for me." Give it some deserved thought - what do you want for YOUR life? Lay the ground work for those goals early on, and be patient as you work towards them. Tell people in your life what you are up to so they can cheer you on and hold you accountable. Make a vision board of everything you want for yourself so that you can start to mentally illustrate what that "success" will look like. But, definitely stay present as you work towards meeting your goals - meaning, don't get so caught up in the future that you sacrifice being actionable and realistic with yourself in the present. What can you do TODAY to move yourself closer (even just an inch) to achieving something important to you? Is it going to the gym or signing up for an exercise/dance class? Is it writing a letter or picking up the phone to say 'hi' to someone special to you? Is it spending a few hours looking at career sites? It is reading a book that recenters you? DO IT.

This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose...

#18: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

While I haven't read either of these recommended books (yet), I did a little research and am definitely interested in the overall concepts that these books explore: recreating ourselves and committing to making changes within to work towards changing the world at large. Amazon.com, here I come!

Read “Bringers of Light” and “Conversations with God” by Neale Donald Walsch. These books will help you decide what you want to do in this life and how to get to that point. They will also profoundly change the way you look at the purpose of existence. Read them!

Here are some little excerpts about the books - they seem to be companion books:

Conversations with God, Book 1 was the start of Neale Donald Walsch's ongoing dialogue with God. The trilogy contains the most essential truths and lessons for spiritual seekers, and these books are the bestselling of all the author's works.

All of the concepts found in Conversations with God revolve, ultimately, around a central theme. The purpose of life is to re-create yourself anew. This book takes that insight and renders it functional. Between these covers is a step-by-step exploration of the process of recreation, complete with assignments and exercises. Based on one of the most astonishing books of our time, Conversations with God.

I am definitely looking forward to getting immersed in the Conversations with God trilogy, followed by the succinct  "Bringers of Light" book. I find myself cynical and skeptical about religion, so much so that sometimes I think it inhibits my spirituality a bit. This series would be a great way to open my mind again to the idea of the greater energy that exists in the world and how to really be our best selves for the sake of our well being and that of all people. In my opinion, being open to the possibility of new beginnings and transformations of what "was" are the most beautiful things one can master. 

#17: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

Funny that this should be the next tip to post about, considering I didn't get to bed until 3am last night!

Sleep less. Fully adjusting to a new sleep cycle can take up to 21 days, so don’t give up if you feel tired after switching to 5-hour nights. The “required” 8 hour/night is for normal people. Figure out how much sleep YOU really need and adjust accordingly. As enjoyable as sleep is, waking existence is much more fulfilling and efficient. IF this really sparks your interest, check out alternate sleep cycles with which you can be fine off of 2 hours of sleep per day.

Yes, talking into the early hours of the morn' sounded so much nicer than crawling into bed. But, for long term health, isn't ample sleep a huge necessity? This is something that I need to do more research on before I start guessing at it. If any of you AVID readers have some hard facts, please enlighten us! Because what is good for the mind and heart (talking to someone lovely into the usual sleep hours) may not be what is good for the body overall (more sleep?). TBC...

#16: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

What great timing... for myself, at least. This is one we can all relate to - you've probably had one if those times where you wish you could take back your dishonesty because of how messy it got. Hastily, we think it might be too hard to deal with the reality, so we create an imaginary one. Telling the truth is always "easier" on your conscience and your heart, and it's ultimately better for other person(s) involved. No one likes to be deceived. 

Be honest at all times. Lies lead to nothing but trouble. Being known as trustworthy is an excellent trait to maintain and essential to having integrity.

I'm ashamed to say I've had my fair share of "I'm going to save this situation with a lie" moments. I have told "white lies" and I have concocted elaborate stories to cover things up. But I have always, always regretted it. It feels so terrible, because I am always the reason that I am in the position to lie in the first place. Either I let something I needed to communicate go unheard, or I was afraid of what sharing the truth would mean so I dug myself into a hole. If I had integrity, I would never feel the need to be dishonest. I feel the need to recenter. I shouldn't overcommit to others or make the potential of hurting someone else's feelings a reason to lie. I must always default to being honest and not bending the truth. How can I expect others to be real with me if I avoid the truth myself?

#15: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

 Sometimes I find myself worrying about little things throughout the day or over-thinking a small task I need to get done. Today's tip helps to end the drawn out anxiety we may fuel...

Set aside a specific time to worry each day. Ponder all of your problems and anxieties during that time so that they will not distract you during work or moments of pleasure. This way you can be extremely efficient with your time and avoid focusing on negative things as much as possible. If you get all of your worry out of the way and have the mental fortitude to keep from reverting back to them, you will be much happier on the daily.

I really like this idea - if you are going to worry, get it all out, and then be DONE with it. When I go on a walk or a hike in the morning, I tend to go through my list of things to do and get my jitters out then. It helps to be grounded in a nature-filled setting, sometimes with some inspiring music (if not just listening to the world around you). If you aren't a morning exerciser (I've been doing yoga at night lately), you can take at least 20 minutes on a lunch break, between classes, or whenever you have to take a breather to just unravel your thoughts. Look at the things you need to do (whether on a hand-written list, on the device of your choice, a visual to-do list) and commit to being actionable. Be realistic with yourself in the amount of time and resources you will need to complete the task. Write in errands on your calendar and set aside time for yourself to be productive in whatever you have on your plate. My friend and I like to go to a cute cafe with a notepad and/or laptop and just bang out things we need to do for the week (pay bills, research various topics or events). Think about what routine you can get into to help get all of  your worries out for the day! If you have a method that works particularly well for you, please share below!

Don't Worry, Be Happy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HeDyxfLJsgI

#14: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

This tip really speaks to me, because one of my big callings / sources of fulfillment is helping others. 

Help others. A plethora of reasons why this is a MUST:

• Helping people has a ripple effect. If you help someone they will feel more obliged to help someone else, and so on. Pay it forward

• You grow by giving and helping others. It can change you in ways you never expected

• Your relationship with that person will become stronger

• It’s the most fulfilling thing you can do on this planet. It not only feels amazing physically, you also feel like a good person

• You might be able to call in a favor later when you need some help

• Karma (if you believe in it)

• Because there are more people in this world than just you

I believe in this 1000%. Helping others, only when you are really altruistic about it, is such a wonderful way to love them. Whether it's a family member, a friend, or a stranger, helping is a universal expression of love and care. I like to make people feel special by lending a helping hand or surprising them with something that will make them smile. I really enjoy helping take a load off of others and feeling like I am contributing to them feeling more balanced and loved. It's important to me to know that the people in my life feel like they can count on me and call on me. I thrive so much on the high I get from helping others and the joy it brings the recipient, that it's hard for me to be with people that I can't contribute to. I don't know how to be myself around people who are closed off to getting help from me. I realize that I feel a loss of worth if I can't be of service to the people that I love and care about. My enneagram results (Achiever, wing Helper) really speak to this desire I have to make others happy and feel helpful. I guess there are worse things I could want! But, I realize that this trait (like all others) isn't all "good." Sometimes I use it to avoid thinking about myself and the things that I need help with (whether I need help from myself or others). It's so much easier for me to focus on how I can help others than it is to be self-flective. Naturally, I am really drawn to people who can engage me on a deeper, "self realization" level. Through journaling and sharing with close people in my life, I have come to some very interesting conclusions about myself and my growth. But those who can "help" me / facilitate a less surface evaluation of myself (and or those who are really in touch with themselves) are very desirable because of my tendency to think of others' needs more than my own. 


It's interesting how I chose to interpret this tip tonight. The direction I took my response tells me that I am learning to think more about what I need - from others and myself - and to be aware and accepting of who I am. 

#13: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

Sorry to post this tip in the midst of a bit of a rain... but it's so important for overall health and mood.

Get in the sun. Superman was completely re-energized when he flew out to space and soaked in some rays and you can do the same right outside your front door (if you live in a constantly dreary place, my apologies). The sun feels amazing: your entire body will be coursing with warmth and life. 

In addition to those warm memories of summer and reminiscent smiles that perk up at thoughts of a sunny convertible ride or a beach day, there are medical reasons why the sun makes us feel so energized and uplifted. Vitamin D, the "sunshine vitamin," may protect against a host of diseases, including osteoporosis, heart disease, and cancers of the breast, prostate, and colon. Additionally, sunlight has other hidden benefits—like protecting against depression, insomnia, and an overactive immune system. Sit outside without sunscreen for about 10 mins in direct sunlight every day, and your body and mind will thank you handsomely! If there isn't any sun to bask in, make sure to eat food high in vitamin D (fish, milk, some oatmeal/cereal), or take a dissolvable supplement. 

#12: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

Today's tip is simple.

Read books. No explanation needed.

Whether you enjoy fiction or non-fiction, reading is such a wonderful thing. You can travel to imaginary places and go to other parts of the world through the pages of a good book. It's nice to use books as an outlet to get immersed in an interesting story or to relate to characters you wouldn't otherwise meet. Some stories can be mindless fun, and others can really stir things within us or teach us about some unknown. They also spur great conversations - who doesn't like melting over a good book with another fan (or perhaps someone opposed to it)? It's even more exciting than talking about a TV show or a movie, because the visuals and audio live in the mind of each individual reader. I love to ponder different interpretations of scenes or how a character may actually look. Whenever a movie is made from a book I've read (which has been happening a lot lately), there is always that moment of truth where you have to see how the movie executives have interpreted the book. Will they get that sub-character right? Does the actor look like the character that has been played out in your mind? Will they keep true to the climactic ending you imagined?

Don't default to a new show or movie when you are looking to stimulate your mind with an outside medium. Give your imagination a jog and read a book instead!

Below are some of my favorite recent reads. Please comment and share yours with me! I want to have a new book at the top of my list for when I finish The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest.

#11: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

A wonderful tip for today and all days. With the Full Moon upon us, today is a day to really be actionable - at work, with your goals for the new year, in setting appointments and making commitments. As you make things happen today, keep your thoughts positive.

Think positive thoughts.When you find yourself thinking a negative thought, stop it immediately by any means necessary. Slap yourself in the face, yell something positive at the top of your lungs or jump up and down. Do whatever it takes to get back to a positive mindset as such is essential for continual happiness and success.

Stay present and consult reality when you start to have negative thoughts. I've mentioned this before...Usually we slump into negativity when we are experiencing rejection, worry, anxiety, regret, intimidation, etc. None of those things can exist in the present. If you are worried, anxious, or intimidated, realize that these feelings can only affect us when we obsess about the future (which doesn't exist right now). Feeling rejected or regretful and any other kind of dwelling in the past are hurtful too. So let's all be proactive with our positive thinking! New year = new possibilities. Like one of my earlier posts mentions, forcing yourself to smile and thinking about something exciting really can help to repel negative thoughts. There are lots of other natural ways to boost your mood too, including eating a plant-based diet, getting plenty of exercise, and even sitting in the sun for 20 minutes. Those more regimented mood-boosters can help us work towards this tip of the day, which is more about the immediate "slap on the wrist" to train ourselves to deflect unrealities and negative thoughts. It may take time to condition ourselves, so we must be patient and persistent. Share with me what works for you to help snap you out of it! I like to be vocal - either saying "Okay, really? STOP THAT!" aloud (if I'm at work, I like to imagine that one of my friends is saying it) or blasting a mood-boosting song are usually good ways to induce a reality check (be proactive and make a HAPPY play list if music resonates with you as a good deflector).

#10: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

Funny how these seem to pop up on the precise days that I need them most! I guess it's a combination of the fact that all of these tips apply to every day, and the energy pulling me towards needing a boost.

Don’t take life so seriously! Learn to laugh at the little things and this whole "existence" thing will be a whole lot easier. Be amused by your mistakes and failures and be thankful that you learned your lesson and won't mess up like that again. And most importantly, do things that you enjoy! Life is not strictly business, it can be mixed with pleasure.

I woke up on the wrong side of the bed thing morning and rolled out kicking and screaming. I could have ruined my whole day if I kept that attitude up. Luckily I have people in my life who can see my mistakes and remind me that no mistake is really that big of a deal. We are still here aren't we? Well, then there is a lot more living to do, and a lot less pouting and regretting. It's such an art to be able to laugh at ourselves in times of failure and weakness. But if we are staying present, those "times" really don't last that long (they certainly don't really exist the length of a whole morning).

#9: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

This is a great reminder for all of us.

Drink water. Hydration is tremendously important for overall health. Soda has absolutely ZERO nutritional content; it's like pouring a punch of sugar into your cup. Instead, fill it with life-replenishing water. It may taste plain at first if you're coming off of a heavy soda-drinking streak, but you'll soon find yourself addicted to it. 10 glasses per day us optimal, how many have you been getting lately?

I'm currently trying to kick a cold, so getting enough water is especially imperative for me right now. What I like to do to "remind" myself to drink water or to gauge how much I've had is to fill up a big metal canteen and keep it on my desk at work. I know that I should go through AT LEAST one full canteen just in the time that I'm at work. When I am regularly practicing Bikram Yoga (which I am right now), then I need probably double what I think I can handle. Soon it becomes second nature to just take gulps throughout the day. You realize that times you thought you were hungry for a snack, your body was actually just thirsty!

Right now with my sore throat, I struggle to drink a lot of water because the water at work comes from a chiller. Cold water on a sore throat is NO fun. So hot tea has been my go-to. But water in it's pure form is really important. Try to have room temperature water as much as you can, because the body actually absorbs it faster. (The body has to heat up everything to body temperature before it can be absorbed, so it takes longer for the body to really drink in the cold water.)

While I don't ever drink soda, I know it's a big "thing" for some people. If you care about your health at all, you won't drink that crap. As for juice - if you MUST drink the concentrated stuff, at least cut it in half with water to wean off of it. Otherwise, you should really invest in a juicer. Veggie juice in the morning gives me more energy than coffee.Oh, and coffee? Kick that to the curb too. Not only is it addicting (in more ways than one - I'm looking at you people who make the cup in the morning and then let it sit out), but it also leaches vitamins and minerals from the body. Particularly, it leaches calcium from your bones. And you will die. Just kidding - but really, drink more water!!!

#8: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

I must admit, I did smile when I saw #8. This tip couldn't have come at a more perfect time.

Smile more often. Whenever you get a grin on your face, your brain is releasing serotonin, the happy hormone. Smiling is the natural way to force yourself to be happy. Many people even smile for five minutes straight in the morning to get themselves in a great mood for the day. It is a very powerful tool that is utilized less and less as we grow older and need happiness more than ever. Just remember that while happiness leads to smiles, smiles also lead to happiness.

Look at that perfect cycle! Happiness leads to smiles, just like smiles lead to happiness! The holidays are the 'most wonderful time of the year,' but they can also be some of the most emotional times. We look at those who are present in our lives, those who are far away, those who are temporarily absent, and those who are forever gone. We look at chapters closed and projects that have gathered dust. The start of the new year can also be very moving as we purge the old and open our minds to the new. Heck - with all of this movement in our lives and deep thinking, we may forget to stop and smell the roses (and smile!). The anticipation built up around the close of 2011, and then around the beginning of 2012 sometimes makes me want to crawl into a hole. SO much to take in. But it is in these moments of avoidance and resistance that I sink into no-smiling mode, and my mood is definitely directly affected by that (and vice versa).


That being said... SMILE! :D Think about the possibilities (for this very moment and even for the days ahead) and recognize that you are creating your own reality every single moment. Being sad isn't a reality unless you let it be! With the flick of a switch, you can shake off whatever negative emotion you are feeling and try out happiness instead. (But you have to truly want to be happy for this 'trick' to work. I have definitely said I wanted to be happy, but really just wanted to sulk in misery. Bad move.) Watch your favorite movie, dance around to some awesome music, cuddle up with a good book, try a new recipe, get some exercise, watch a funny cat video (if you're into that... like me), call an old friend. There are endless ways to bring a smile to your face. Somehow it's easy to forget the infinite opportunities when we are deep in our sad caves of resistance. I'm so happy to put this out into the universe so that I can be reminded to smile and all of the reasons why I should! "Every end is a new beginning" - 'new' anything is exciting and reason to smile!


Here is a song that ALWAYS makes me smile from a movie that makes me really happy...

#7: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

A nice follow-up from my last post (#6 - Be Present)...

Even more specifically, live in THIS moment. Even 10 minutes ago is the past. If you live purely in this moment, you will always be happy because there is nothing wrong in this split-second.

 Wow! This brings a nice sense of relief when you really think about what it's saying. "Even 10 minutes ago is the past" - if we can make a conscious effort to not live in the past, even if it was just a few minutes ago, we can never be ruled by those emotions that only live when we are not present. Awesome! Taking this with me into the new year...

#6: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

Just in time for the holidays, when we feel called to reflect on the months past and look forward to 2012...

Learn to focus only on the present. The past is unchangeable so it is futile to reflect on it unless you are making sure you do not repeat past mistakes. The future is but a result of your actions today. So learn from the past to do better in the present so that you can succeed in the future.

How great is this? All we have is right now. Literally. The past does NOT exist and we don't have access to it - we can't change it, so why dwell? Of course, we reflect and reminisce. But to live in the past and to base your mood on what has already occurred is exhausting and counterproductive. The best (and sometimes the hardest) thing we can do for ourselves is to live in this moment. There is no telling what the future will hold, and if we spend the present stressing about the future, then we aren't really living the life that we have right now. We are essentially just wasting precious time. All of the familiar quotes like "Carpe Diem" and "live every moment like it's your last" may seem so cliche, but they couldn't be more true. Being present and celebrating what we are experience in this very moment can only add to our excitement and satisfaction with life. Negative feelings like regret and resentment can only be experienced when living in the past. Stress and anxiety are often are a result of focusing too much on the future. If we can all practice being more actionable and embracing the present, we would all be infinitely more happy and balanced.

Oh... and just in case I wasn't clear...focus on the present, not the presents. ;)

#5: 50 Life Secrets and Tips

#5 is a big one. It's super important, and it seems so second nature when you think about it. BUT, people (including me) will find any reason in the world NOT to do it... exercise.

Get fit! It's ridiculous to think that we have one body, one sole means of functioning, and people are too lazy to take care of themselves. Fit bodies lead to better health, confidence and more success with romantic endeavors. I'd say those are 3 very good reasons to get in shape. 

Exercising and re-energizing our bodies isn't really as scary and daunting as we make it. And our bodies always thank us handsomely when we do it... so why not give ourselves that treat consistently?! I understand that it can feel like a nearly impossible feat when it's been a while or it feels like your body is incapable of moving the way you'd like. But those are just feelings, not realities. And if you hate the feelings of being out of shape and being unhealthy enough, then you won't let yourself get to that place of self-discouragement for too long! It may seem challenging at first to hop back into a routine, but think of it this way. Would you ever, willingly, go a day without brushing your teeth? GROSS, RIGHT?! Those are the only teeth you have, right? And you don't want to have terrible breath, right?! Then why would you ever let yourself be lazy and inactive? Isn't that the only body you get? Do you like to look like a frumpy, unfit person? No. No one does. SO, give your  body and your mind a reason to live and rejoice. 

This tip is a particularly good one for the holidays. We tend to overindulge with eating and relaxation this time of year. So make sure you put aside some time to get active too. This will keep you feeling balanced and your spirits high in the frenzy of the season.

(don't think I'm talking down to you - whoever you may be - I am writing this as total encouragement for myself and others!)